Through A Man’s Eyes…
Ladies,
Stop trying to be married before your married. Make sense right? However, a lot of women seem to be guilty cooperates of this heinous crime. Woman have a misconception that if they have a man, especially if he’s a man that you see yourself marrying, that you have to do everything for him. YOU DO NOT have to go all out for a man that is not your husband! This is bad in a couple of ways, first off it’s a set up because what if you give a person your all and it turns out he doesn’t want to be with you, or you find out he’s cheating on you. One thing I’ve learned about life is that you can’t change a person; neither does that person have to change. As a business major I always hear the phrase “With high risk comes high rewards or high failure.” In relationship that is very relative. The old saying to never put all of your eggs in one basket, and why should you if it’s not necessary. No matter how much you try to rush a relationship it has to go through different seasons or trials to determine if it’s real.
I had a friend who was talking to three different women, I know sounds bad, but hear me out: First girl was almost finish with her bachelors in college. Second girl already graduated and was working. Third was just starting college. After all was said and done the one girl he was most interested in was the one who just started college. As you may be just as confused as me, I asked why he chose her, he said because she had the most standards. Not only did she have standards for the man she wanted to date, but for herself as well.
As much as you may like a guy the worse thing you can do is he give him something that he, one- doesn’t deserve, and two- that goes against your standards. Of course some guys will shy away from a woman who values herself, but that’s not the type of man you would want anyway. If he can’t meet your standards then he doesn’t deserve you, and if you chose that person anyway, then you’re lowering your value of yourself. So instead of high risk comes high reward in a relationship it’s more like with high standards comes high rewards.
So ladies, keep up your standards and be ready to receive your prize!
Inspirationally Yours,
Mr. I.N.S.P.I.R.E.
(Inspiring & Notably Spreading Positivity In Relationships Everywhere)
6 comments
Permalink1
Thats for bringing this point to light…not many women know this…I didn’t for a long time.
Permalink2
i would definitely agree with you on alot of it, but..the part where you mentioned the 3 different ladies.. how can you determine which had the “most standards”. what makes the 2 ladies, (one thats almost finished with her bachelors and the other thats already graduated), have less standards than the one who is just starting out? i’d think that the 2 ladies who got their path paved out vs. the 1 who’s just setting down the map would have more expectations. but truely, i certainly believe its just up to that own individual to set their own standards-high or low, whether she’s in college, outta college, with a degree, or not.
i definitely like that quote though..”with high risk comes high rewards or high failures”…amen to that!
Permalink3
i needed that
Permalink4
I have to agree and disagree a tad on this one. You are right we should never lower our standards for any man even if it is a man that we feel we are going to spend the rest of our life with. Putting all our eggs in one basket can lead to a man leaving,staying or you wanting way to much to fast and scare him off. I told my mom the other day there have been guys whom I thought I was going to marry and she asked, “thought?” how many have you prayed about? I think that we all get like that we THINK he is the one but, we havn’t prayed yet so in doing that we start to give our all cause we THINK! ……. How will a man know that he has what he has been looking for if we dont show him? When my brother or my cousins come to me and say Charma what do you think I think she is the one am going to ask how do you know? And how will they know if all she has shown them is that she has standards? ….. So, no we shouldn’t give them our all cause I’ve done that way to many times but, give them enough so you and him know what we are gettin into and wont be blind sided when we say “I do” ….. people get divorces like they change socks now!!
Permalink5
I agree with your disagreements and yeah divorces are like getting ipods lol. Of course you have to give something, but the main point I’m trying to convey is you shouldn’t give everything off top. I understand that’s apart of a lot of women’s nature, but you should have different step or requirements when you do certain things. And when you ask your brother of cousin what you like about a woman it should be she has a great personality, great chemistry as far communicating, has goals, makes me laugh, strong minded, and of course God fearing. It shouldn’t just be because she holds me down, she does anything for me, or even because she good in bed. I talked about having standards for the guy you choose, but I should have elaborated more on having standards for yourself, that where its starts because once you do that then it will reflect on the partner you choose, and if you don’t go by your standards then your settling and will never be truly happy. Of course there’s always potential to be better, but you shouldn’t force it; and eventually you need to make the decision that it’s not working out and leave it at that.
Permalink6
I’ve often thought back on my days in trapper education when dealing with this one. I’ve never actually trapped for furbearers, but one thing has stuck with me all of these years. If you’re trying to catch raccoons, you can use sardines or anise for bait. However, sardines will attract housecats too. If you don’t want to catch someone’s cat, you use anise. I hope that wasn’t too long-winded of an illustration, but the point is this: be the type of girl that the type of guy you want is looking for. If you want to catch a godly man who isn’t trying to get you in bed on the second date, don’t go to bed with the guy. If he’s the right sort, that won’t chase him away. If he’s the wrong sort, he’ll leave quickly. I once heard this advice for finding a mate: Run towards Christ as fast and as hard as you can. While running, look around and see who is running alongside you. That’s the type you’re looking for. Leaving the cap off the toothpaste tube can be negotiated, and bedroom skills can be learned, but spiritual incompatibility will cause you more pain than you can imagine. Find a guy you can pray and worship with and you’ve gone a long way towards finding a real partner.